The psychobabbling food-loving seamstress.

You know your becoming a piece of the carpet when…

Posted in Uncategorized by Ambs on May 15, 2009

…you have those old battle ground stories from venues that have past.

…you have reno stories of venues that are still standing.

and…you can name a band in every venue in Melbourne that you fell in love with, in its hallowed walls.

I’m still coming to terms with the fact that we nearly lost the Tote this week. It’s a bizarre concept.  I couldn’t imagine The Tote going without a massive send-off like the Punter’s had.  I’d hope that the Melbourne Music community would not let that happen.  It was heartbreaking enough to lose The Punter’s, and not because it was devastating loss to the scene, but because of the memories(or lack-there-of in some cases) that the venue held for anyone involved, from Punter’s, to Bookers, to Bar Staff, to Bands, Everyone.

I’ve always been resolute to the thought that a venue can also make or break a good gig.  No matter how many people try to tell me that a good band will have a great gig in any venue, or that there’s nothing such as “atmosphere”.  That my friends is a load of Bollocks.  If a band has no appreciation for where they are playing, I find they are more lax with their playing, which means no passion, which means no connection, which equals shit gig.  As far as I’m concerned every band, no matter how big or small, should play every gig like it’s their last.

A list of Melbourne’s 10 best venues came out this week…voted by, I’m not sure who!?!?

10. East Brunswick Club –  I really like this venue, I have been a few times, I enjoy myself, and their sound is good.  No qualms here.
9. The Ding Dong Lounge  –  Ahh the now hallowed walls of Dongers.  I’ve seen some rip-roaring gig’s there.  Most of my favourites have been local bands.  My official favourite night was the night Ben Birchall and Dave Roger’s played together.  Two of my fav boys, and they did the most amazing cover of “Handle with Care” that night.
8. The Espy (and all associated rooms) – Ahh…. The Espy.  May your hallowed walls fill me with happiness(I giggle everytime I walk past that pic of Scotty O playing the Gersch for the IFYOG launch! Also smile like a goofball when I walk past the pics of Strummer and PJ) and beer(sometimes warm), your cheap pizza sucks.  Your parma’s aren’t bad, and your Front Bar has amazing sound and an atmosphere which is second to none on the right Friday or Saturday night.  I have a dream at the moment, and that is that I get to see Paul Kelly do a gig in The Espy Front bar, that would make me supremely happy!
7. Billboard The Venue – BLAH! That is all. I like to hear my bands, not subliminal distortion.
6. Toff in Town – Oh the Toff, you are awesome-tastic!  I really love the Toff, whether it’s rooftop cinema, or quiet beers on the roof, with the amazing view of my home-town, or an amazing gig.  They make good Pimms here too.  🙂
5. The Hi.Fi Bar  –  Oh my, Comedy, Music, I’ve enjoyed it all here. Favourite gig EVER @ the HiFi, ANDREW WK!!!!!!!! OMG!!!!!!  The Living End with Trav on double kick bass drum, coming a close second! Oh, and Justin Hamilton MC’ing Comedy Fest club on my birthday this year! SCORE!
4. Corner Hotel  –  The Corner, I have seen all of my favourite bands within you.  I’ve laughed, cried, hugged, and screamed myself silly many times.  You make my favourite Parma in Melbourne, I just wish you had Heiniken on the menu, that is my only complaint.  Crownies do suffice though. Thank You, Thank You, Thank You.
3. Palace (Formerly Metro) Nightclub  –  Hmmm… I’m not sure. I think Metro, I think Rebar, I think GOO.  I’ve not been to a gig here yet, I couldn’t imagine anything but what the place looks like at some ungodly hour of a Friday morning looking at a cute tattoo’d boy through beer goggles.
2. Prince of Wales  –  Another venue I’m at odd’s with.  I’m not sure you deserve 2nd place. You have poles that like to get in my way all the time.  I will give you credit for the fact that you have good sound. I’m not sure I would place you in second though.
1. The Forum  –  Never have I ever seen a bad gig here.  Sound is always amazing, atmosphere as soon as you walk through the Glass doors.  This is the last bastion of smallish show before you start to do larger more stadium like gigs(Festy Hall would be next on the list!).  It has atmosphere, and as sad as it sounds, you feel like your connecting from any place in the room.  More lighting on the Stairs though thanks. No one else needs to hurt themselves here.

A few places that wern’t mentioned(past and present):

The Punters Club(RIP)  –  Oh my, I got kicked out of The Punters Club once for screaming too loudly.  Which probabaly sounds funny as it was an amazing venue in which many people screamed in, the only problem for me was that I was in the front bar and I was screaming my freinds name, “ttaashhhh, ttasshh, where are you ttaasshhh?” *cue bouncers taking me by the arm and putting me out on the street* I scammed my way back in, only to be kicked out again within 10 minutes!
My first ever real pub gig was at The Punter’s, I went and saw this little band on a thursday night called Klinger, and that’s where it all started.
The Evelyn  –  Another Fitzroy institution, I’ll admit it has been awhile since I’ve been to to The Ev.  I miss it, I’ve seen some amazing shows there, stand outs were Ignite/Sommerset, Gordon Gaino/Dave McCormack, and numerous Klinger/Pinkwhistle/etc gigs…
Northcote Social Club  –  Oh my, I love you NSC.  Great food, good beer, great atmosphere, very homely, much like The Punter’s, and of course for the obvious reasons.  I once followed Chris Cheney around this pub like a Puppy Dog… oops.  I shall never do that again!  Well I’ll try anyways.
Rob Roy(RIP)  –  I was at odd’s with the Rob for a long long time.  I’ve seen some really good gigs there though.  Sad its been changed to the Newtown Workers Club, and is there still a bandroom?  Miss seeing Mr Cash’s welcoming finger everytime I walk into the room.

I love Melbourne, nothing could compare to what it feels like to go and see my favourite local bands here.  Nothing could compare to songs about my favourite places being sung in my favouruite pubs.

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Suburban Blues…

Posted in comedy, crush, food, general musings, giggles, love, music, nom nom, relationships, writing by Ambs on April 29, 2009

I got the suburban blues.
The low-down-dirty-suburban-blues.

I want my inner-city comfort back.

Actually I want my own little slice of the inner-city.

Fitzroy is home, its my happy place at the moment(well it has been for about 10 years). Unless of course when I go overseas I find another happy place(NYC anyone?). Fitzy is it.

Feel like I’ve grown up there, I skipped classes at Tafe to go sit in cafes and read when I was 18/19/20.  I’ve fallen for 10 different Fitzroy boys in the last 10 years! That’s right, count ’em TEN!
I can name all of them too, egads! But I won’t.

I do wonder whatever happened to Brendan and Jack though, I’m sure I saw Jack about 5 years ago walking out from the milkbar and I ran.
I do however know that one of them is now in a rather large band I loved, and still do have my moments with. Andy Andy Eyecandy, best guns on the planet, and I blushed the day he lent over me and asked if there was anything interesting in Beat that day(he smelt sooo good!).  I’m meant to forget idiotic moments like that right?
Or the night that my bar crush took me aside and told me he wanted to chain me up and spank me(oh please don’t let my mum read this!), he disgustingly enough had/has a girlfriend. I decided against going near the bar again, on the grounds that he was a sleeze! Sad though, as they make the best hot chocolate on the planet, and his specialty was strawberry daquari’s, and they were goood!

There’s the Punters, gone and lost. The amazing gigs I saw there, I shan’t forget(The Meanies, Klinger, and Mrs Pinkwhistle, BEST GIG EVER!!!!), and I’ll never forget the last night of drunken frivolity.
Nights at the Evelyn(or the evilyn, depending on what happens really!), Pop, punk, giggles, and great music. Unforunately I never got to go to the Ev’ before it was reno’d, so no old school “I remember when the stage was at the front of the room” stuff from me.
The Vegie Bar, which I like, but used to love, they have gotten better, there was a period of blah though. The food wasn’t as good.
Joe’s Garage, great food, and lovely staff. I’ve never had bad food, or not felt relaxed or at home there.
Red Tongue, food good, staff lovely, good for a Sat/Sun morn brunch.
The Hideout, I miss, with all my sweet lil heart. Well I miss when Mary was managing it.
Akari 77, great Japanese food! I loooovvveee it!
Red Rice was okay.
Nights at Bar Open, lordy lord. Sometimes it’s bizarre. Okay embarrassing admission, I licked a random boys tattoo there one night, not sure why, safe to say that copious amounts of beer had been consumed!
The Spanish Club ❤ . My first night at Spanish Club, was the night that Tripod won me over. Was Radiohead night too. I remember 3 distinct moments that night, 2nd Drawer Down going for faarrrrrrr too long, The Gatesy Brigade sitting in front of me getting confused by the Tron joke, and me laughing my arse off, and The Gatsey Brigade hunting Gatesy down at the end of the night. I had honestly never seen a group of girls swarm a man so fast in my life. Well apart from Chris from TLE, but even they seemed not as vulturish. I said I wasn’t going to be one of those gals, technically I wasn’t, but I did kind of, in my own special way! I should go and see them again, am waiting for the rock opera we’ve been promised!
The Rob Roy, ahh so many good gigs! I’ve seen some great gigs there. I walked through the other night on my way to Trades, its different, and there were lots of business attired people in there. Where the hell is the band room now? Sad to see they couldn’t fix that steep stoop into the gals toilets, I’ve nearly fallen down that thing a billion times!!

Brunswick Street Bookstore <3!
Sheila Vintage, the new vintage shop, they actually have some nice stuff!
Polyester Books and Music… mmmm
Grub St books.

The list goes on, I should be living in Fitzroy.
If home is where the heart is, then I lost mine in Fitzroy.

The Psychobabbling muse – herein she starts…

Posted in comedy, food, music, nom nom, psychology by Ambs on March 28, 2009

Psych pushes me to think outside of my square, it pushes me to think in general, and I can study so many different facets of the world that intriuge and scare me, and understand them through the eye’s of the mind.

If I’m afraid of something, I seek knowledge to understand it.

I hate reading newspapers or watching the news. I hate reading headlines, and even moreso I hate reading over-sensationalised peices of faff from people who have only studied the piece of information they are reporting on for about 48 hours. Not really down with over-sensationalised reporting in general.

I find places like Twitter and Facebook amusing and interesting. I like the fact that we can recieve real up-to-date, moment by moment, from the ground reporting with this technology.

I’ve met a lot of people over time that I never thought I would learn from, but have taught me some of the most amazing things.

I love to learn about culture, I dislike reading about it, but I love to listen to people speak about their culture, how they live in it, and why they live the way they do. I love to learn, and I find talking to and learning from others is the best way to do it. I love to sit and listening to people speak, one of the reasons I enjoy comedy I suppose. I love to watch people tell stories, to be able to make fun of ridiculous situations.

If I can’t get my head around something I ask questions. I question everything. I question peoples reasoning for doing certain things, and they don’t like it, but I’ll keep on questioning. My enquiring mind does not stop.

I’m used to being ignored, but I don’t deal with it very well.
My brain works at odds with itself at times, I really want your attention, but once I get it, sometimes I don’t know what to do with it. Those negative thoughts fill my mind, and I used to listen to them, as I thought they defined who I was. Now I shall sit with them, and let them be there, but also counter-act them with the sensible side of my brain.

A few articles that will pop up over the next few days…
-Psychological revelations about who I am at this particular point in time, what is changing in my world, and how I am dealing with the changes. An on-going body of work, making me feel all Freudian, maybe it’ll help someone else someday.
– Growing up and leaning about the world, what I thought was slow, but was actually earlier than I realised. Remembering my tweens(back then we were just kids, and we still are) and how that part of my life really shaped who I am today.
– Music, music, music, and more music.
– Laws of attraction, realising why I always like the “bad boys”, and why the nice guys always get lost in the crowd.
– Comedians, why I love them, why laughter is one of the best forms of medicine, who my comedic heroes are, and why.
– Why a well written piece of prose, can be amazing on paper, but when translated to a spoken submission, all the laughs get lost.